Vacation Part II – Eat, drink, stay Healthy!

Posted on 6 August, 2012 by Renée

OK we all know what it’s like…

we go on vacation

especially “back home”

and there is SO MUCH good stuff to eat! Especially in New Mexico!

I mean COME ON!! “Red or Green?”

Let’s not forget all the places I wanted to go:
Blake’s Lotaburger (green chile cheeseburgers)
Dairy Queen (chili cheese dogs)
Sonic (Sonic burger #4, cheese tots, and a large cherry lime)
Krispy Kreme (do I need to say more?)
Any dodgy looking taco house
Any dodgy looking BBQ house

the list goes on!

The reality is, all that stuff above, that made me fat. At least that sent me on my WAY to being fat. That was the time of slight gluttony, of throwing caution to the wind, of eating now and caring later. Honestly, I wanted that stuff. I really did.

And I did have some of that stuff. But I had the chili dog, no bun and a kiddie blizzard. I had a cheeseburger with a GF bun, I had the tacos, no sides. And then I did this stuff:

and then I did a LOT of this:

Other than that I also down to Starbucks to meet my brother (a mile down and back up the hill) – no big deal right, but it was 100 degrees F and my entire family was like “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU!? TAKE THE CAR!” and another day whilst in Scottsdale (110 degrees F) we walked 1.5 mile down to the breakfast place and back. No biggie, gotta earn those Huevos Rancheros!

So my friends, indulge. Have fun. Enjoy! But be responsible. And make sure you have some ice cream too :)

Vacation – Part I

Posted on 5 August, 2012 by Renée

Wow. How does one actually update after being away from the blog more than a month and part of that (3 weeks) being vacation?

I’ve thought all week about what to post but I’m still a little lost. So how about we just start at the beginning?

We actually left on the 9th of July to fly to Phoenix via London. We had quite a long layover in London and since I’m still on my gluten-free experiment, prior to leaving the Netherlands I went to a crunchy shop to buy some stuff to snack on that would keep me on the straight and narrow. One thing I didn’t want to do was use vacation as an excuse to eat whatever came into view, so I was fully prepared in case I became hungry. This actually really worked well so I’m glad I thought about it and planned ahead.

After a long day of travelling, we arrived in Phoenix, waited in the godawful queue to get through customs (this is something I don’t get; I have a US passport, my family are Dutch, but we all come in together. Why do we have to all wait in the NON-US line? Last year in Atlanta I was told to bring my family with me. Different rules everywhere. Make up your mind people!), picked up our rental car and drove the 2 miles down the road to our hotel. Within about 3 minutes of checking in, we dug out our swimsuits and jumped in the pool. It was HOT in Phoenix, about 115 degrees Fahrenheit.

I won’t recap the whole vacation, I promise :)

We took a couple of days to drive to Albuquerque, going immediately the next day to the Grand Canyon. My second visit. Still Amazing!

We also went to the Petrified Forest and the Painted Dessert. I’ve never been there before, even though I’m from the area. I guess that’s always the way things go. It was nice to just drive, stop when we needed, get an ice cream, listen to Sirius radio all 80′s hits :) Very relaxed. I felt a sense of real relief and joy when we saw the “WELCOME TO NEW MEXICO” Sign; finally I was HOME! About an hour before we got to Albuquerque, it started to rain. Trust me though, the rain in NM is wonderful! It’s cold and it’s huge drops and it comes down completely out of the blue and makes everything smell and feel clean. I miss that so much. Even the kids said they really loved the rain. So different from what we have in NL.

So we arrived at my dad and stepmom’s place and basically we stayed there for two weeks :) We did also see my mom and stepdad, my brother, his wife and my nephew, but it was easiest to stay at dad’s in Albuquerque; more room and the use of the car, plus my grandmother is now in a care facility there and my dad brings her over every Tuesday and Thursday so I was able to spend time with her as well. I was able to see also two of my best friends from school, Tammy and her husband Brian and Shaun and Shaun’s husband Tony (who were even at our wedding in 2009 :) ).

I loved that I could go to the Sunflower Market (like a Trader Joe’s I guess) and buy fresh fruits and vegetables, and gluten-free products to keep me on my program. While we did go out for breakfasts (easy to get something NOT pancake related) a few lunches and some dinners I just stayed away from wheat as much as possible. I ate well. I even over indulged at times (hey, life is short), I had beer (not Paleo, I know!), margaritas, wine, ice cream, other deserts and you know what – THE WORLD DIDN’T END!

We went back to Phoenix during our last week, on a Tuesday, but it was really sad to go. Even my little guy started crying when he said goodbye to my stepmom. The kids did so well speaking English. My stepson helped my dad with all kinds of things and my dad taught him some things about photography. Luckily in Phoenix we were right next to the Fashion Square Mall (ok, technically Scottsdale), but I was also able to see an old school friend of mine again. It was HOT HOT HOT in Phoenix, but we dealt with it by hanging out at the pool. Tough life, eh?

The trip back was LONG but we managed. Everything went smoothly until of course we were back in NL and we couldn’t get directly home by train, there was construction and we had to take a bus partially. At 11pm no one was really interested in doing that, but yeah, what are you going to do?

Jet lag has been hard to get over. Then I got sick and I NEVER get sick, so that was really annoying (I’m still a little bit chesty, I don’t know what it is). I took Wednesday and Thursday off sick because I had fever as well as this chesty/cough thing going on. Friday I had no more fever so it was time to go back. Still trying to get into the swing of things again.

It was great being home. Things change in life and we are going to definitely start talking about and planning on eventually going back. My parents are getting older and I don’t want to be too far away anymore. Of course it’s all early stages and the kids need to be a bit older before we go, but it just goes to show you that you NEVER know how life is going to turn out – you just have to be willing to LIVE life and be OPEN to changes or opportunities.

So. Where Was I?

Posted on 16 August, 2011 by Renée

Right. I had a little vacation. Three weeks to be exact. That was the first time I’ve actually taken three full weeks off of work to spend time with my family (we always have the kids for three weeks of their summer vacation). Even though I’ve been here in the Netherlands for 17 years (today!), I still feel like taking more than one week or ten days is too long to be away from work. I’m getting over that feeling though, now, obviously.

Before I left I also had a nice, good, calm feeling about everything. I had done all that I could. I had written up documents (that sounds fancy; they were not) for my team to back me up while I was away. I left my laptop and my desk key at work. My work phone stayed at home. I was going to enjoy this holiday without thinking about work!

And that happened pretty much for the most part. We went to Crete again and had an amazing time. The weather was awesome, the food was fabulous, and the beaches were sandy and beautiful. The kids are older now (13 and 10) so we had I think maybe only two occasions where things got a little hairy (it used to be an almost daily occurrence). We swam. We walked. We ate ice cream. Vacation life is good.

One thing I’ve learned over the years is that vacation doesn’t have to mean that you undo all the hard work and effort you’ve put into weight-loss/maintenance efforts. It’s also a good lesson about life. Sure, when we are in our normal routine, and we have full control over what we consume, then by all means, do your best. When on holiday – RELAX a little bit. Life would be terribly boring and stressful even if all we did, all day, every day of our lives was worry about calories in vs. calories out.

The fact that you make an effort to be “reasonable” on holiday is actually enough in my book. Why should I pass up desserts on holiday when I just about never have them in my normal, regular, structured life? Why should I pass up an ice cold beer in the afternoon whilst sitting by the pool, when that is actually the thing that *I* feel would be most refreshing at that moment? Life is too short to worry about a few vacation pounds/ kilos.

So here’s what we did. We stayed in a little apartment-hotel that had a wee kitchenette, including a little refrigerator. We went to the grocery store and bought basics: for the Dutch Crew – bread, cheese, lunchmeats; for me – light cheese. We bought low fat milk, yoghurt, and lots and lots of fresh fruit (which by the way is SO wonderfully delicious the further south you travel). In the mornings, we had our coffee and breakfast at the apartment. Sometimes at lunch we would eat at the apartment as well (similar to breakfast items), sometimes we would eat out and then just have dinner as sandwiches at the apartment. Sometimes we’d order huge Greek Salads and share them between the four of us. We had one big, hot meal a day. We drank tons of water. We walked like crazy (and it that heat, we were sweating buckets) and we swam like the fish themselves.

My clothes still fit when we had to return. I didn’t feel like all my efforts were for nothing. In fact, I got on the scale to check the “damage” – 2.5 KG. That’s all. That’s 5.5 lbs. As of this morning (non-official w/i, but just checking) I’m already down 700gr or 1.5lbs.

I know there are people out there who are very strict about their intake, about logging every single morsel, every day, but that’s not me. I already know that I can only do as much as I can do with the way my body is behaving right now – I’m not going to restrict myself further or not allow myself to have fun outside my normal routine. There are probably people out there who would say, “Well, that’s probably why you can’t lose weight” and you know what? That’s fine to think that. I realize that “having fun” doesn’t necessarily have to mean food and drink, but actually I LIKE those things and I’m not going to give up what gives me pleasure with others. I am active and fit and healthy and yeah I gained weight on holiday. It’s no big deal and it will be off again in no time.

With all that said, I AM logging on MFP again since I’ve been back as I do want to stay a bit structured when I’m not travelling or just on “normal” days. While ultimately I would like to be under 80kgs, right now my focus is mostly on 1) getting back on a (food) routine, 2) healing my knee, 3) getting a regular activity schedule and 4) starting to run again (whenever that may happen). One day, one step, one choice at a time.

What’s New Pussycats? Part I

Posted on 17 May, 2011 by Renée

I’ve been incredibly busy lately. Rushing around all over the place.

My parents were here for a day, as I mentioned in my last post. They went on to Denmark and flew to Luxembourg as my stepmom’s best friend from school lives there with her husband. Hubs and I rented a car to drive down (nothing really wrong with our car, but we needed more room for their and our – story coming – luggage) and on Wednesday afternoon we picked up said automobile at the airport to hit the road.

Something about road trips. You know you are with the right person when some of the best times you have with someone are traveling (that and home improvement, a sure-fire way to test a relationship). We absolutely LOVE traveling together. We have a GREAT time. Sure there’s the occasional squabble over directions “do you want to drive or are you going to let me?!” and the where-do-you-want-to-eat-I don’t-know-where-do-YOU-want-to-eat situations but for the rest we get on like a house on fire. The minute we are on the road we are on “holiday”. Even if that holiday is an overnighter somewhere or a weekend away.

So we went down to Luxembourg City on Wednesday evening, which is a four hour drive through the Netherlands and Belgium and specifically the Ardennes. It’s a beautiful area but of course it was late and we couldn’t really see much. But we laughed and listened to music and stopped along the way to eat dinner (Pizza Hut Express; not my favourite but what are you going to do?).

We arrived at our Hotel in Luxembourg, appropriately called Hotel Italia (?), managed to get parking, checked-in, and situated and then walked over to a little square with a few pubs to have a beer. After a four hour drive one needs a beer to chill out and relax; you can’t be expected to jump straight in the bed like good little boys and girls do!

We went to sleep around midnight, woke up at 8 am, had breakfast (not my favourite again but certainly these continental breakfasts are for carb lovers! lots and lots of bread, croissants, jam, Nutella, that sort of thing) and then headed over to pick up my parents. We then spent the next several hours in the car, talking, laughing, waxing and waning philosophically at times. We stopped in Belgium for coffee and petrol, in Limburg for late lunch (they were hell bent on pannenkoeken yet when we finally found a Dutch Pancake House they weren’t super impressed with how it looked!) and then went to Arnhem so they could see where we live (our apartment AND the city).

We gave them a little tour (the apartment takes two seconds), dad and Hubs chatted about nerdy things, stepmom stroked the cats, and we did some practical things as well like getting them all checked in for their flight the next day. We then did a little round of the city, at least the parts we know and headed off to dinner at our favourite Greek restaurant in Arnhem. Great dinner, great company, a great day and evening all in all.

We took them to their hotel afterwards (which they LOVED) and said goodnight. We arrived home very shortly thereafter and went to bed with the intention of getting up early (enough) to pack for our own trip to England. They had to catch a 2pm flight back to the US and we were off to London at 3pm.

With that I’ll leave you and post Part I and perhaps even some photographs if I can get it all together at around the same time.

Now that we’ve got that out of the way

Posted on 17 March, 2011 by Renée

How about an update?

My vacation was fabulous for the most part. I had not been back to New Mexico for nearly 5 years though I had a slight taste of the Southwest 2 years ago when Mr. Lowfatpie and I got married (we went to Arizona, Nevada and California). I have to say – each and every time I go back I am reminded that there is absolutely nothing like the endless sky found in New Mexico. I miss that and several other non-tangible things (and some tangible food items) and it’s actually hard to describe to people who have never been there. In some ways it’s still very much like the Wild West. In other ways, it’s modern, hip and cool. Plus the wide open spaces and natural beauty that is literally all around you. I would really like to go back at least once a year from now on and have to find a way to make that work.

My main purpose of the trip was to see my dad and get a feeling for myself whether he was OK or not. He’s a very positive, pragmatic guy and I didn’t expect that he would tell me over the phone if things were not going well with his treatment. I wanted to just go and make sure I saw him in case godforbid the treatment didn’t work or it turned out to be worse than he was letting on. Dad is fine, he’s even officially finished with the radiation now and while there were a few side effects I truly believe he is going to be ok. He was also really grateful that we came, even though there was no emergency – it meant a lot to him. To actually hear him say that made me feel very good (normally he doesn’t say those kinds of things) and I knew then I absolutely made the right decision to go.

I have a different relationship with my mom than I do with my dad. Not bad, just different. When dad saw me he exclaimed “You’ve whittled down to nothing! You’re just a wisp of your former self!” and he mentioned it every single day I was there that I had lost weight (because in fact I was around 95KG when I saw him last). My mom on the other hand said nothing, but talked about her weight loss (and yes she had lost weight and she looks quite good and fit for a 62 year old woman). It’s not a big deal, it’s just a difference that I don’t really understand.

I think also over the years I have discovered that being more and more like my dad personality wise makes me less of myself when I’m with my mom. Again, this is not bad, just different. I love both of them, just differently. And for the record if my mother were ill, had cancer or whatever I would also go to her and stay with her, make sure she was ok (and maybe even stay for the longer term if necessary).

So anyway, we stayed at my dad and stepmom’s most of the time we were there, in Albuquerque’s Nob Hill Neighbourhood. We ate out, a lot, but we ate at home too. We shopped at the local Import Supermarket so that Hubs could arrange the ingredients for a homemade curry (as that is his thing). Food shopping has always been an experience with my dad – I’m certain my love of good food and drink comes from him and I remember HOURS of food shopping when I lived in Chicago and he was in the suburbs with his 2nd wife and stepson (stepmom now is number 3).

I did bring my running gear with me but boy was running difficult! There is such a huge change in elevation that I am definitely not used to! On the Sunday that I was at my dad’s, before we even went to breakfast (they go to a local diner every Sunday!) I was up and running early in the neighbourhood. I literally mapped out a square so I would know exactly how to get back to the house. I ended up running about half and walking the other half (total of just over 8KM). Right near the end, I was running on the sidewalk because it was a busy road and I tripped over a crack and went flying! Ugh! It hurt, but it was more embarrassing than anything (someone did see me and screeched up to the sidewalk to see if I was ok. It was all very dramatic). I made it back home without any real injury but I spent the rest of the day with a killer headache that I eventually had to go and sleep off (I think it was a combination of the elevation and the eating of the sidewalk).

I also ran with Katie at Fit Living Daily! What a real treat! Katie lives near my mom and on Monday and Tuesday I was in that area so we made plans for Tuesday morning at 7am! Hubs and I drove to the Starbucks near to where we were going to run and Katie and I left him behind to enjoy his multiple espressos while we headed out to the desert! I can’t tell you enough what an honour and a pleasure it was to meet such a genuine person, that I only previously knew from the internet. Katie, I miss you and I wish we lived closer!

(Katie Hope you don’t mind I took this from your blog?)

So those were my two running days, I had some shopping days, a tourist day and a day that I spent going down to Alamogordo to see my grandmother. She’s 88 and a little bit mad (she’s a hoarder and her house is a disaster), but she’s still very, very clear. She is another reason why I want to go back more often; I have no idea how much time she has left. While her house is a disaster, it’s also a wealth of history – she has photos all over the place, in boxes, bags, frames, taped to the walls. These photos are my family, all that is left of it, and I was able to get a few more of them home with me for safe keeping (sometimes she gives them to me, but generally she wants to keep everything, like this photo of when she was in the Navy, taken when she was 22).

Hubs did make dinner for us on Wednesday evening and I invited an old school friend over as she lives and works in Albuquerque as well. We have known each other since we were 10! We have had periods where we were out of touch but when we are together it’s like everything falls back into place. I love that so much. After I left she and her husband went and had breakfast with my dad and stepmom at their Sunday Morning Diner, which is think is just awesome!! It’s like I’m still kind of there and frankly this happens to me all the time. I bring people together and it’s as if I’m actually with them.

We did spend also an afternoon driving up to Jemez with my mom and stepdad. This was a really nice day as well. It’s such a beautiful area – I’m so amazed every time I’m up there. Since food was involved in almost everything we did, we couldn’t resist to stop off at a café at Jemez springs for coffee and pastries… nom nom!!

One thing I am totally amazed about is the portion size of food. I can totally understand why people struggle with weight and with the choices that one can make when eating out. One night we were out to dinner at a place called Street Food Asia – we had a couple of appetizers between the 4 of us, then the chef, who knows my dad quite well, brings out something else for us “on the house”. By then I was already full but I’d ordered a fried rice dish and knew it would be on the way. I had no idea what to expect but when it arrived I swear it must have been like 6 portions! Every time I took a bite I felt like it was multiplying within the bowl! I did not eat it all but I still managed to stuff myself to the gills. Then afterwards, dad and stepmom wanted to go for frozen yoghurt because well they always go for frozen yoghurt afterwards. Seriously I thought I was going to vomit on the road and yet, by the time we got to Olo, I joined in the yoghurt eating festival. Ugh. Not normal!!

Gaining “only” 900g during this vacation is a true miracle. While I’m trying not to worry too much about the number (though as I expressed to you yesterday I still think about this stuff all the time) I felt like a stuffed pig by the time we left. It seemed we were always eating! And the way back was no exception. Food in the morning at the airport, lunch at the next airport. Snacks. Food in the plane. Food at arrival airport. Ugh.

I am sad to be away from my family and friends, the blue skies and the big white puffy clouds, but I’m happy to be home where I can get my schedule back in order. Food-wise, movement-wise, it’s time to get back in the groove.

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Things I learned or Accomplished on Vacation

Posted on 27 July, 2010 by Renée

1) I read an entire book. In Four Days. that may not seem a big deal to some of you but I never read anymore. I try to read whilst communting and I’m generally too tired and I fall asleep. Same for right-before-bed reading. It’s over in like three minutes. (Go ahead, ask me what I read :) )

2) I thoroughly and honestly enjoyed several days at the beach. Just relaxing. I don’t relax well, but this vacation I did!

3) I learned that my body isn’t so “bad” after all.

4) I ate whatever I wanted, including the “good” and the “bad” things. I found myself craving more vegetables and less french fries.

5) I ate ice cream. This is a big deal since I seem to have issues with lactose at times (though not yoghurt, not buttermilk, but some cheeses and I thought ice cream).

6) I laughed with my hubs and stepkids A LOT. This was a fairly stress-free vacation. The kids are getting older and we are all more relaxed with each other now. Took a few years.

7) I gained so much more appreciation for my stepkids, who are extremely well-behaved. I know all parents say this, but I’m telling you, I have seen and heard so many unacceptable (IMHO) things coming from other children around me. Kids who could probably get away with murder and their parents wouldn’t do crap about it.

8 ) I’m lucky too that they will eat just about anything. No picky eaters means we could try several new things and everyone was enthusiastic!

9) Fruit is so tasty and delicious. Better than any junk food!

10) I’ve seen more boobs that I ever really wanted to see. Unfortunately not one nice pair. Not even the fake perky ones. I will never go topless again – I just don’t think it’s necessary and it’s just not really pleasant to look at. Some of you bloggers may disagree with me and that’s ok.

11) Greek salad is the best invention ever.

12) I really, truly LOVE the dry heat. I miss this most of all. Greece is freaking HOT.

13) There really is nothing better than an ice cold beer in a glass that’s been in the freezer on a bloody hot day.

14) I like the beach more than the pool, despite having sand everywhere. I would love the pool if there were not 37 annoying people there and I could actually swim.

15) Pop music works best on the beach – thank you Kylie Minogue and your new album for being there on my holiday! (I’m not ashamed to admit it! I heart Kylie!)

Everything is fine. So What’s Wrong?

Posted on 24 July, 2010 by Renée

I’ve officially been home from my Greek vacation for one week now.

It was only Wednesday that I had to go back to work, so I even had a few days to get used to being home again.

Yesterday, quite late in my work day (since I was late anyway) I felt like I could eat my weight in chocolate and then made an attempt to do so.

I thought about Mary’s Post regarding Guilt Over Food, and that I commented that I don’t feel guilty when I make choices that are not exactly on my plan. And this is the truth. I don’t feel guilty. But I couldn’t understand WHY I chose to go a bit crazy at the end of the day with the chocolate.

I mean, what was it?

Was I Hungry? Yes. A bit.
Was I angry? No.
Was I lonely? No.
Was I tired? Yes, most definitely.
Was I stressed? Yes. A bit.

I slept like crap from Tuesday night onwards. I don’t know why – the anticipation of going back to work, the heat and thinking/wondering about the new kitten we picked up on Sunday may have been what was causing me to not be relaxed. This lack of sleep thing really, really kills me and I don’t know what to do about it.

I have mentioned it several times; I live very far away from my job and travel a minimum of 4 hours a day return trip. I have to get up by around 5 – 5.30am on a normal work day to be to work by 9. Normally we leave the house at 6.30. I am one of those people who need that time in the morning to be calm and relaxed or my day is not set up for success. So there is no rushing. Rushing creates stress which creates a bad mood. I know myself well enough now in my nearly 42 years that I need to take it easy in the morning. During the day at work I have fun but I have stress too. I have people pulling me in all different directions. I’m new-ish (2 years) in my role and am still learning how to lead and manage people every day. This takes a lot of energy. I promised myself at the beginning of 2009 that I would not work any overtime anymore because it was just too much. For the most part I’ve really succeeded in that. But this week alone, just Weds – Friday I did nearly 5 extra hours. That’s almost another working day. No wonder I’m tired!

I also have a meloncholic feeling about returning to work. I love traveling and being on vacation but my bank account doesn’t love it for too long. So I have to go back. I half-jokingly asked Hubs if I could stay home and be a housewife while he worked and went to school. Of course he would get the benefits of a clean house, home cooked meals and a wife who wasn’t passing out within two seconds when her head hit the pillow. We know the reality though. I have to work.

I have thought about getting another job, here where I live, but this thought makes me unhappy. I love the company I work for, my job is OK (I’m pretty OK at it for a newbie), I really enjoy the extras I get to participate in, I love my colleagues.

We have wanted to move from here for a long time, but that’s also not in the cards right now.

So this is my reality.

Little sleep, lots of train rides, little time to myself, little time to dedicate to family and friends.

Everything is fine. I’m happy in general. I’m working on my health and I’m feeling good about results. I have a great Hubs, stepkids and friends.

So what’s wrong?

Why did I immediately go back to old, non added-value habits, already yesterday? Why??

I could say that it doesn’t matter why. I could say I learned something from it. I could say I’ve moved on.

But I’m feeling a little bit down. Even after getting back into the swing of things again. After a run this week. After two good sessions at the gym this week. I feel a bit empty.

I would like to feel that excitement again. I am going to think about some things I would like to acheive in the coming month. Something to put a fire under my arse, something to put some structure in my day and week (because structure is VERY important when you have little time). Something to shift my focus away from the things I can NOT change right now.

In the meantime, I AM participating in Alan’s 30 Day No Scale Challenge! I really want to participate in this to really train myself away from measuring success only by what the scale says. I have managed to go a few weeks, but never a month. So let’s see how we do!

Now for your viewing pleasure, some trip highlights:

Knossos

On the coastal Road

Windmill

Stopping off for Frapp’s at Starbucks Heraklion

Practising Pin-Up

Sunny, Sandy, Freckled

T and Me at our favourite Restaurant, on the beach

By the palm tree

The “Four Little Fonzies”

Beach Bodies

Posted on 19 July, 2010 by Renée

(written from the Beach in Stalida, Crete)

At the beginning of each year, we are blasted with suggestions to “lose weight” and “get fit” because of course we have to look good for Valentine’s Day or Spring Break. Then around March we are blasted with all kinds of diet and exercise tips so that come summer we have the perfect “beach body”.

What is all this noise about perfection and looking good though? I mean, my opinion of what looks good is clearly different than what others’ opinions are. As I sit here on the beach, with a differently shaped body than the last time I “enjoyed” (I didn’t, in fact) a summer holiday, I see nothing more than normal, imperfect people. Skinny, fat, short, tall, blubby, muscley, white, burnt, over-tanned. I make jokes about guys with their bellies hanging over their speedos (a punishable crime in my book), or ladies with ill-fitting bikini tops (did they not look in the mirror?) But you know what? It doesn’t matter!
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What matters is the time spent with family and friends. The belly guy walking hand in hand with his wife, still loving each other after 30 years together. The father building sandcastles with his son, the almost teenager enjoying her time with her family and
building great memories to look back on. Do we need body perfection for this?
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Yes, it’s important to be healthy. Being fit also helps, especially when it comes to playing with your kids, running for a bus, or walking a lot whilst on holiday. Isn’t THAT closer to perfection?

When I see in front of me that no one is perfect (even the body builder who is so tan he’s nearly black) I realise that there is nothing wrong with my body. Sure I could use some tightening up here and there, and according to health calculators I am still in the “overweight” category. But in this world of imperfection I am sitting in the middle of “perfect” – Sun, sea, sand, watching my husband play in the sand with my stepson and hanging out, relaxing on a beachbed with my stepdaughter. What more could I want right now?

I know I will always need to stay focused on my health but this bliss I’m experiencing is WAY better than a number on the scale!

(by the way, the hatred of my legs stopped this vacation. they are really not so bad after all)
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Whatever You Want To Call It

Posted on 3 July, 2010 by Renée

So, hey guys – who listened to Two Fit Chicks Podcast #14 this week? As I love MizFit and Shauna, I of course was very keen on hearing their episode on Intuitive Eating. There were a lot of things they talked about which made a lot of sense, some things I had heard before and some things which I really could relate to. It really got me thinking about the subject.

I am no expert by any means, and really, the only “expertise” I have is knowing what it’s like to be on and off and on and off and on and off track.

What’s this track of which we speak? Lately my mindset has been (thankfully without legal or illegal substances) altered into thinking much, much differently about the “journey” (ugh, someone please come up with a better word; I hate this one!) I’m on to become more fit and healthy and live the best life that I can, accepting my body, my mind, my spirit, essentially my life.

And maybe this is getting off topic a bit, but on top of being on tracks and wagons and various other things, what about cheating? The word “cheat” in itself indicates something negative, like you are not allowed. I mean I’m pretty sure you are not allowed to “cheat” at poker, sports games, tests at school, etc. Is it horrible that the use of this word really makes me crazy?

Or what about saying that one is “bad” or “good” – since when is eating or drinking what you want “bad”, ever? Did you want it? Did you choose it? Are you responsible for it?

When I think of intuitive eating, especially now, I do think of it as being much more mindful in what I have chosen to put into my body. Yes that may very well be 6 pints of lager and 3 shots of Jaegermeister because I’m out with friends on a Friday night. How did I feel doing it? How did I feel the next day? What will I do differently (no more shots, for example) in the future?

Perhaps this also sounds strange but this is why I turned to Weight Watchers in the first place. I know that Shauna really hated the little food planner forms that WW gives us to fill out (and I agree Shauna, there is never enough room on those damn forms!), which is why – when I DO track – I use the online system. Besides, like a true nerd I love all the graphs and charts and numbers and entering my own food items and recipes. I could be very wrong here, but I’m pretty sure Weight Watchers is meant to teach us a few BASIC, FUNDAMENTAL things:

1) PORTION CONTROL
2) MAKING CHOICES
3) EATING FOODS THAT HAVE MORE VALUE THAN OTHERS

Intuitive eating to me is:
1) Eating when you are hungry. Being in tune with real hunger vs. cravings or THIRST
2) Are you craving something? What is it? What made you crave it? Is it EMOTIONAL or PHYSICAL?
3) Are you enjoying what you are eating? Have you noticed how it smells, tastes, what the texture is?

I think once you learn, Weight Watchers style, how to eat, THEN you can start breaking it all down.

It probably sounds VERY strange, but I very rarely have cravings of any kind. I don’t crave chocolate or other sweets for example. CRAVING and WANTING are two different feelings. I would say 99.9% of the time that I WANT chocolate, it’s because of an emotional trigger. STRESS, ANGER, LONLINESS, BOREDOM.

When I eat “bad” foods, I just eat them. I want it, I choose it, I am responsible for it. What I have found is that I am now ENJOYING it rather than shoving it in, eating in secret or going overboard on it (don’t talk to me yet about beer, because I still tend to go overboard when I go out for drinks). So for example, recently we had a special pre-opening event of a new store near my office and I had some brownie samples (maybe half a brownie worth), two bites of lemon cake (didn’t really enjoy it so didn’t eat more of it) and instead of having a frapuccino like I had original planned in my head, I opted for a one-pump sugar free vanilla latte.

This is an amazing feeling of freedom to just TRUST yourself, choose and enjoy.

This is the definition of intuitive eating for me, or whatever you want to call it.

It’s about learning what works and what doesn’t work and working towards something sustainable. If you can not or are not willing to do (or not do) something for the rest of your life, you will go “off track”.

I’m much more relaxed lately about when I reach my goal. I know now that I have to adapt to what is going on RIGHT NOW and TRUST MYSELF so that in the future I am that Healthy Person I want to be.

I’m going on vacation tomorrow. I’m looking forward to updating you all when I get home!

Seven More Days

Posted on 27 June, 2010 by Renée

Seven more days and I’ll be lying next to the pool or on the beach in Crete.

There have been a LOT of changes since the last time I went on holiday with the kids and Hubs to Greece. That trip was in July 2007. We had a great time (for the most part – but there were times we weren’t thinking the kids were as cute as they look in photos; I’m sure you guys know what I mean), but I was fairly miserable in the heat, weighing around 225lbs.

I remember I had a hard time finding summer clothes. If there is one thing I really do not like, it’s being fat AND hot (and I’m not talking sexy here). I hate the way my legs would rub together. I couldn’t find a swimsuit that fit very well. I hated wearing sleeveless shirts because I didn’t like my arms. And sweating. Man could I sweat buckets. Before anyone else did. I really dread the summers when I am overweight simply because I am so uncomfortable.

Since I had like 1,372 starts, stops and re-starts since around 2005, I have had plenty of opportunities to make the summer more comfortable for myself. Only last summer did this start to happen. What with running (the C25K program), biking and bellydancing, plus the fact that I was actually finally working the Weight Watchers program, this led to more comfort and more self-confidence. Amazing how that works.

It’s taken me quite a while, which is fine, because as I was reminded this week by Mary at A Merry Life this whole thing (“journey” or whatever you want to call it) is for the rest of our lives. It’s not a must to reach numbers by a certain date, time, duration, year, whatever. This thing I’m doing has to be basically forever (and no giving up!). So yeah. It’s taken some time, but I’m now in the 70′s (78.4KG was the last weigh-in), which is pretty much where I was in 2005 when I started to really panic about my weight gain. Had I only known it would take me 4 years to get my act together!! Well, even if I had known, maybe it still wouldn’t have been enough for me to do something about it. I truly believe that no change will ever stick until you are really ready.

Here I am in Rhodos, July 2007

and here I am, today, June 2010

In seven days I will be on holiday again with the kids and Hubs. But this summer vacation will be different. I have more confidence – mainly in myself and the choices I make. In the past I was either afraid that I would screw everything up so I couldn’t enjoy things OR I would have something I “shouldn’t” and then think “screw it, I’ve already messed up today” and go on a week-long binge, only to be angry and scream to the heavens about how UNFAIR it all was (even though I did it to myself!!). At this point I actually have LEARNED something. I know about portion control (and I don’t HAVE to be afraid to NOT have my food scale with me), I know that eating a “regular” yoghurt for example, instead of a fat-free yoghurt, is actually OK. I am not going to put on 10 kilos overnight if I don’t have exactly what my past-brain required. I’ve let go of the all-or-nothing way of thinking and I’ve moved on to MODERATION with food and alcohol. Am I perfect? No. Though I’d love you all to think I was ;-)

In seven days I will actually ENJOY my vacation, the sun, my family and my LIFE. We only get one life. We may as well enjoy it. Healthy living goes way beyond just losing weight. Now that I finally get that concept I feel like the whole world has opened up to me.

So don’t be hatin’ when you think of me lying on the beach in Greece, soaking up the rays (whilst applying SPF50), or swimming in the glorious blue Mediterranean sea. Eating fresh fish, and gorgeous salads and having the occasional popsicle. Because I will be enjoying my life and reporting back to you on all the things I’ve learned while I was away. And I would almost bet money that there won’t be a serious effect on the scale and if there is? Not the end of the world!

{run} {laugh} {eat pie}

amazing what changes when you start to run

Tag Archives: vacation